Flashback Friday Song of the Day - Can You Feel the Beat - Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam

In the mid-eighties, Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam was absolutely fierce! Can You Feel the Beat was the second single off their debut album with rap group Full Force, and it fared best as a dance song, where it peaked at #6 in 1985.


Lisa Lisa Cult Jam - Can You Feel The Be by jpdc11



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Funerals and Sentimentality, but No Weddings

Earlier this week, while I was at the Pride Parade in NYC, my ex called me to tell me that his dad had passed away.  Mr. E. was 93 years old.  His health had been fading for awhile, so his death was not unexpected.  Having been a part of Joe's family for more than 20 years, of course I was going to be there.

pitytrain

A little over a year ago, Joe's nephew had passed away suddenly and unexpectedly and it was the first time in almost five years I had seen anybody from his family.  I was almost as nervous about seeing them as I was about the wake itself (I do not like going to them!), but in the end it turned out alright. Since this time it was Joe's dad who died, I felt I needed to be there for the whole time, which meant three wake sessions and a funeral.  As I would have expected, the whole thing was a mix of emotions for me.

It was nice to see many of the people in Joe's family, and I never really became sad until yesterday, the day of the funeral.  Sometimes the most unexpected things bring out the most unexpected reactions and one little gesture at the mass did me in.  I need to explain a little bit first before I continue...

You see, Joe is one of 9 children of James and Dorothy E.  The family en masse is pretty close, and all of the nieces, nephews, in-laws, aunts, uncles, brothers and sisters, are always getting together, and always having a good time, and for a long time, I was part of those get togethers.  Over the years I've gotten to know them all like my own family, and many of them are near and dear to my heart.

Of course there are people in his family that were never really nice to me, and my interactions with them at the wake were like they always were...a little ignorance, unfriendliness, and whatever.  But then there are those in Joe's family who loved, check that...still love, me as one of their own.  It was these family members who made my time at the service partially a pleasant experience.

Three kids in particular I had been very close with over the years.  Little Richie, Lisa and Nicole are the children of Joe's sister Maryann and her husband (Big) Richie.  I've known them the longest and the best, and it was really great to see them and their children, most of whom were tykes when I left the family. One child in particular, Skylar, I've known since she was born, and she and I were always pretty close.  She's going into 9th grade this year and it was so nice to see her as a mini-adult.  It was Skylar's uncle and little cousin that stirred up the sadness in me...

During the funeral mass yesterday, I sat alone towards the back of the church, and looked on as the family took that solemn walk down the center aisle behind the deceased and toward the pews in the front.  I watched each face carefully and thoughtfully, knowing that the next time I'd get to see any of them will probably and unfortunately be the next funeral.

One group of people walking together was Little Richie, his wife Jen and their children.  As they walked by, Richie leaned over to his little 7 year-ish-old son Alexander and pointed to me.  I hadn't seen Alexander since he was about 2.  Look Alex, there's Uncle John. Alex looked up at me, smiled, and gave a little wave.  I smiled back.  Yeah, I am still Uncle John!  It was the first and only time I had cried all week.

For the remainder of the service, I sat there in a different mindset, mostly looking at all of the people in Joe's family from my vantage point behind them.  I remembered and relived parties and incidences shared with them that I had long since forgotten about.  Family parties and get togethers, holidays and vacations, weddings, and yes, funerals.  I was once a part of this great big, loving family, but I don't belong with them anymore.  They're a part of Brian's (Joe's new partner) family now, not mine.

So that last hour spent with Joe's family was spent in displacement and sentimentality.  I miss them and I'm going to keep on missing them.  Who knows, maybe I'll stay in touch with a sister here, or a a niece or nephew there, but of course it's not the same as it used to be.  That's okay, though.  Life turns out the way it turns out, and at least I've got memories and family members I still get to see at the occasional wake.  Just no more weddings.


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Independence Day Song of the Day - Pink Houses - John Mellencamp

urbandogs

Happy Independence Day! You know, there are a lot of good songs that I could post as Song of the Day for today, and several of them were written and performed by this man.  Whenever I think of John Mellencamp, the words 'heartland' and America always come to mind.  There are so many great songs by him, and many of them could fit here easily, but this one's my favorite for the 4th of July.  Enjoy!

Pink Houses／John Cougar Mellencamp by gaimon5656

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Marley & Me?

I know that there are a gazillion people out there who consider themselves dog lovers, and I am not one of them.  Oh sure, I do love dogs, but I've never been in a situation in life where I'd ever even consider having one as a pet.  Dogs are cute and lovable and playful and all that, but they do take a lot of work, and living alone I think it'd not be very nice to leave one at home alone all day long.  That's why I have cats...they are much more self-sufficient.

Tonight, however, I almost...almost, had a change of outlook.  It all started innocently enough.  I was coming home from my nightly walk and as I let myself into my house I turned around to close the door and there was a dog who appeared out of nowhere, wanting to come in the house.

The dog was adorable, smallish and mostly black, and he (it was definitely a he!) seemed like he belonged to somebody though I'd never seen him around before.  And did I mention he was lovable?  Oh, he was so cute, wagging his til and cuddling right up close to me, then sitting on my lap...just sitting there!

After the initial shock and amusement at his cuteness wore off, I realized I had to do something, but what?  Call my friend Blanche!  He lives practically around the corner from me and he's got two dogs and a cat and he's a real animal person.  Yeah, he'd know what to do.  I took a photo and texted him...

I just got back from my walk and now I've got a visitor.

OMG! Do you know where he belongs?

No idea.

No tags?

Nothing, but he's obviously is trained, and he seems to want to stay.

Get him some water...Do you need help?

BINGO!  That's exactly what I needed.  I had no idea what to do.  I couldn't just go back in my house and pretend he wasn't there.  Blanche was over in a flash, and saw what I saw in the little thing.  Ow, he's so cute!  And friendly!  And he's definitely trained well.  

Yes, the pooch was adorable, and so well behaved, but Blanche wasn't sure what to do really either.  He told me that it was a Chihuahua mixed with something, but he didn't know what, and that he was up there in age (His face was white!  You learn something new every day!).  We tried to give him some water and a treat from a bag that he carries around in his car, but he wasn't thirsty or hungry. Then we put him on the leash that my friend had brought and walked him around the block, hoping he'd maybe lead us to where he lived.  No such luck!

I was starting to think into the future...let's bring him inside and see how Dylan and Diego (my kitties) react to him, I suggested.  So we did, and he didn't even seem to notice either of them, though they were a little skittish of him.  They did stay around, though, which was a good sign.  I had a feeling that this little guy would be at least spending the night, but still, we had to do something....

I called my friend Kim, from work.  She is the biggest animal lover I know, and I know she's rescued plenty of our furry little friends.  Sure enough, she gave me several tips, including calling the local animal shelters, veterinarians (in the morning, of course!), putting up signs with pictures, etc., etc., etc.  We opted for driving around the neighborhood looking for people who might be looking for a dog.  

So Blanche, myself and the pooch headed out, though I wasn't too confident in our chances, but after one near-miss, we hit pay-dirt.  As Blanche slowly drove down one of the streets near my house(with his flashers on), another slow moving car headed our way slowed doen as we approached.  Their faces looked hopeful.

You looking for a dog?, Blanche said out the window. As he said it, I lifted the pooch and handed it towards Blanche who showed him to the man.  

Marley! He cried out in relief.

Yup, so Marley was his name, and apparently he IS a good dog, except for today, when scared of the pre-Fourth of July fireworks, bolted the yard through an open gate.  Turns out he ran up and over a couple of blocks to my house, where he spent a total of two hours away from his family. Oh, and Marley is ten years old. 

They seemed like a nice family and they were so grateful.  The man told his wife to call their little daughter out of the house and she greeted us with the same shout he gave when he first saw Marley.  They invited us to their holiday party tomorrow, which we respectfully declined before getting back into Blanchie's car to head home.  I was glad it ended up good for the pooch, but I was also a little...just a wee bit...sad, too!  He was soooo cute!

  

We look cute together, don't we, lol

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