I just spent the past five hours packing. Not packing for a trip, but really for the unknown. You see, I've been making these tentative plans in my head for about the last two years and I really still don't know what the heck I'm doing, but I do know it looks like I am selling my house.
I've been avoiding this decision for a long time now, but with summer winding down and a new school year ahead, it is time to dive in and just do it. To be honest, I am scared and sad all at the same time. I'm scared because I have no idea what to expect, no idea where I'll be going, and I dread whatever headaches will be coming my way in the process...
But most of all, I am really sad. As I take pictures off the walls, put my belongings in boxes and organize them into a staging area for moving in my basement, it all seems so real. This is really happening and it's hard to believe. Just a couple of weeks ago, I hit the twenty year mark of living in this house, the longest I've ever lived in one place.
Back in 1998, my ex Joe and I bought this place together after having rented for about seven years. I remember at first, I didn't like it. I preferred another house a few miles from here, but Joe, who was an interior designer by trade, saw the character and potential in this place, and convinced me. And I've loved living here from the day we first moved in.
He and I spent both a wonderful and tumultuous ten years together here, and when our relationship ended, I really thought the house would be sold in the aftermath. Little did I know, I made an emotional decision to buy the house from him and in the ten years since, I've created a new life for myself and have had wonderful times here. This is what I know.
The house is perfect for one person. It's small enough to take care of and it's big enough for entertaining friends. But it has become too much for me to take care of, both physically and financially and I know that I have to do this. The real estate guy is coming Friday and I would imagine after that there'll be no turning back. Sigh! Stay tuned....
Close.the.door. When you walk away, look ahead. Do not look back. Leaving our 1st home was traumatic. Give yourself time. When you leave the house for the last time, make sure you've only packed the good memories. Leave the bad ones behind the locked door. Look fwd to the next home, the next step, the next new loving adventure. You remain in my prayers, John. All the best to you.
ReplyDeleteThank you sunshine!
DeleteMary and I are building a new condo in Colorado and preparing to move out of our existing home of 28 years. we raised our children here and we have filled in with many treasures that we no longer want or need. We are releasing the past and opening ourselves to a new downsized future and it is exciting, but a little scary and intimidating. Good luck on your journey.
ReplyDeleteThanks Mike. The same to you!
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