Saturday, February 26, 2011

February 26, 2011 - The latest from my so-called life

Happy Saturday morning! Well, we’ve dried out a bit from yesterday’s rain and it looks like it’s going to be a nice day out today. As usual, I’ve saved all of my school work for the weekend before heading back to work, so it looks like I’ll be a busy boy for the next 48 hours or so. Here’s some of what’s been going on in my so called life:

I’m a One Car Man

Well, it finally happened! After of almost a full 4 months of owning two cars, I finally sold my Nissan Sentra yesterday. Though I didn’t get nearly what I originally wanted for it, at least I’m now able to save money on having to insure two cars instead of one. Big smiles!

My Nissan

YCN and Examiner

I haven’t done nearly as much writing this week as I would have liked. I penned one piece on YCN called Keys to Life – Key #1 – Live in the Present. It’s the first in a series revisiting, one at a time, an earlier piece I wrote called simply Keys to Life. It’s pretty good, I think. Check it out by clicking the link.

I also penned a piece on Examiner called Weekend Events in Long Island’s Wine Country. I work on the North Fork of Long Island, which is home to more than 30 world-class wineries. It’s always a lot of fun to visit them, as there are special events going on all the time and wine tasting can always be great fun. Here’s an earlier piece on Long Island’s Wine Country if you’re ever interested in visiting.

A Better Place

Yesterday was a whirlwind of activity for me from morning til night. I started off with several appointments for people to take a look at my car and once I found a buyer, it was off to the bank and the DMV to get it all done. Once I got home I thought I’d relax and take a nap so I’d be raring to go out last night, but it just wasn’t meant to be.

As soon as I got home from the DMV I saw that I had a message on my answering machine. It was from Joe. I had forgotten that he had mentioned he might stop by on Friday and that was precisely why he called. Luckily it had only been about twenty minutes since he had called, so when I called him back he was still in my area.

For the first time in a long, long time he and I had a great visit. It was the kind of visit I had always envisioned with him: a nice, normal visit between genuine friends. I know that being friends with Joe has always been a precarious thing, and things have gotten more complicated since he’s been in a relationship (He actually turned me down for the MJB concert back in October because he didn’t want to upset Brett (not his real name!), his other half. Brett was okay with him going, he said, but he still felt a little weird about it, and I totally understand.).

We discussed Brett, among many other things, and I told Joe that I would love to meet him. After all, from everything I’ve heard about him, he seems like a really great person. Joe tells me he told Brett about my visit the other day and he told Joe that he understood…after 20 years together, how could he and I not still have some sort of a connection? I couldn’t agree more and I’m truly happy that Joe’s found happiness with him.

I told him about my relationship woes and like a true friend, he listened and offered encouragement. We spoke about music, one of our favorite common interests. I gave him a whole bunch of CD’s he’d been missing, as I’ve moved on to digital music only these days. I also gave him a whole mess of his old memorabilia, cards and such that I had had here in shoeboxes. He had asked me about them a long time ago and I spent one night going through them all. Talk about emotion! That was a rough one, reading some of the many cards he used to give me when we were first going together. That was a long time ago!

All in all, I am happy with the state of our relationship. I did spend 20 years of my life with him and he’ll always have a special place in my heart. Though I’m happy that we’ve both moved on, I’m also happy that we can remain in one another’s lives in some capacity, and I genuinely hope to meet Brett one day. I think we’ll get along splendidly.

The Rest of the Evening

Even though once Joe had gone I had still planned on going out, my phone kept ringing and that would eventually tucker me out. I spoke with my mom and Rebecca, my student teacher from the fall who wanted some advice on a job she’s been offered, and my old student Max. Max was one of my very first students. He’s a Russian national who moved here from Kazakhstan (Yes, where Borat was from!).

Max and I have had a very special relationship over the years and in the past year or so we’ve stayed in contact. His parents moved from the town where I teach and whenever he’s out here he looks me up mostly because he doesn’t know too many people where they’re living now. Though it can be a bit much at times, it feels nice to have someone who still looks up to me and actually thinks I’m cool enough to hang out with.

Max came by for a little while and though he didn’t stay long, I was tired when he left. I decided to save some money and stay home. I never had the chance to take a nap like I had wanted to, so I went to sleep early for a Friday night, but I guess I needed it. I saw on Facebook that the singer Charo was at Splash last night giving a performance, which would have been cool to see. Oh well, that would’ve been cool, but…

Getting Better

As for my state of mind, I’m following my own advice and taking it one day at a time…living in the present. Selling my car yesterday was a big boost, and so were my visits with Joe and Max and the phone calls, as well. My life isn’t so bad, after all! I’ve got to learn more to appreciate what I have and not muddle in what I don’t. Of course, he lingers on in my mind, but I think I’ve become more accepting of the situation.

I think like before, anger has replaced sadness and I’m feeling like maybe I wasn’t so crazy through this after all. I’m mature and intelligent, and my perceptions and feelings were valid enough that they deserved more consideration than they got. For a little while, I was still hoping for some sort of reconciliation, but I see now that that’s improbable. I feel like I’ve been completely erased and that’s probably better for me in the long run. As always, I have to keep on keeping on…

As always, thanks for listening…

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