Mondays…I hate to say it, but I’m starting to like Mondays. Well, just a little, anyway. After being cooped up by myself yesterday with nothing else to occupy my thoughts other than my current sad state, it’s nice to get distracted by work.
I actually heard from him this morning. He sent me a message via Facebook after reading “The Soundtrack of a Relationship.” He loved it! Aside from the message, he also left two comments on the piece itself. It’s funny because I was planning to send him the link via email and ask him if it was okay with him. After all, not everything I said in the piece was pleasant and though I put my whole life out there for everyone to see, I sometimes forget that it may not be okay to involve others when I air my stuff for all to see.
I’m not sure, but I think that maybe he subscribes to my Contributor page at Yahoo. Otherwise I don’t know how he would have seen it so quickly. He says he used to click on my pieces via Facebook, but we haven’t been friends there since we broke up. I guess it doesn’t matter…he saw it and he liked it and felt strongly enough about it to send me the message on FB, which is nice.
After I ‘defriended’ him on FB the day he broke it off, he completely blocked me from his account. I was always reminded of this whenever I’d go to my inbox there because I saved most of the messages he’d sent me. Next to each message, where it would usually show you who the sender was, would be simply a shadowed box with the words “Facebook User” above them. That always added salt to my wounds. I know he did it in response to my action, but I did what I did only because I knew I had to. At the time, and even now still, I don’t think I want to keep up with his life without me in it.
This morning when he messaged me, it meant that he also unblocked me, and that also helped to lift my spirits at the start of this Monday. I was tempted to ‘friend request’ him again, but thought better of it. Instead I replied with a thank you for the complement and some small pleasantries.
All that matters from this is that the piece that I wrote yesterday was good and it carried some significance for him. He lived those moments with me and I hope it helped him to see that I knew all along what was going on and that during the time we were together, I didn’t care. I still thought he was worth it and I was willing to stick it out in order to be with him. When he said I should have seen it coming in his breakup email, I don’t think he saw things from that perspective. Why would I have stuck around if I knew it was going to end?
Anyhow, this was one of those pieces that just flew from my mind onto my document, as natural as anything. I’d put the first words to the piece on to Word several times this week, only to delete them and say forget about it. I guess my frame of mind yesterday put me in the zone. Those are always the best pieces of mine and I’m very proud of this one. I really feel as if I have a talent for this and maybe, just maybe, someday I can make my living as a writer. Then I can become a night person again, lol.
Anyway, back to writing. It’s still the only distraction I have when I’m at home in the evening, and I’ve been on a roll with it. Thanks for reading…